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Songs for the Theatre of the Absurd

by Echo Park Orchestra

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1.
Dog In A Manger Dog in a manger My canine's a stranger My day is done Horse with a hunger For the straw in the lumber run Dog in a manger You could endanger The other kind Dog with dis temper Remember where the top dogs dine Red sky storm Dogs of the horizon The wind blows cold On kings and everyone Blood red moon Dogs of Helikonia The sun glows strong On queens and everyone From snarl to a simper He's gone with a whimper I should be glad Dog in a manger I'm feeling stranger I must be mad Dog in a cradle Beset with a halo Or golden crown Dog in a manger Are we in danger? We're going down!
2.
To Kellyanne A Mockingbird Poor bird it cannot sing So confused by the right-wing din Poor bird it cannot squawk Bamboozled by the witch talk To Kellyanne a mockingbird It's Kellyanne with her weasel words The theatre of the absurd Kellyanne you're a dirty bird Hell hag of double speak Motormouth with a creep's technique Spin doctor for a maniac Proud owner of alternate facts To Kellyanne a mockingbird With nonsense like you've never heard The leader of the lowing herd Kellyanne you're a dirty bird Hush little baby don't you say a word Donnie's gonna buy himself a ladybird If that ladybird don't sing Donnie's gonna promise everything If that promise never comes More fool you to trust that bum Hush scrawny baby don't you bloviate Donnie's done a deal to make the US hate “Fake news!” the harpy cries As she tries to bolster lies Horse face with cold dead eyes Will watch and wait Whilst the US dies
3.
Flat Earth Army The world's not round Now don't talk soft If it were round We'd all fall off Science and statistics I disagree YouTube is my authority Ah, me! So all the world thinks that we are all barmy We stand so proud in the Flat Earth Army The shots are fake The shadows matte The earth is flat And that is that NASA took the Nazis It's plain to see They're involved in a big conspiracy Ah, me! Though all the world thinks we're mentally ill We stand to gain from the things that we shill Forget about the model that Socrates proposed You'll find the truth is out there underneath your nose Infinite regress, that echoing sound It's goddam turtles all the darn way down God or the aliens gave us a home Oceans and continents under a dome We watch all the boats sailing over the sea This just reinforces all our certainties So half the Net thinks that we smile so smarmy We still stand proud in the Flat Earth Army Misinformation helps us grow We're in our own Truman Show With our mangled geography Misinformation sets us free
4.
The House of Bamboo La Sima number four The house with the bamboo door Bamboo roof and bamboo walls It's even got a bamboo floor It's the place to be You and me Making melodies In the House of Bamboo With the bamboo bone Home sweet home With the mango moan In the House of Bamboo It's not a casino It's not a casita It is a container It's not a cantina It's not an hotel oh It's not a bordello It's hip Get a grip It's not a cupola It's not a pergola It's not a gazebo It's not a gondola It's not a dagoba It's not a pagoda This zone Is like home
5.
The Man Who Walked Across The Sea I've travelled over the oceans I've tried all my life to be free I've struggled with my emotions Marooned on the Skeleton Key I've steered every vessel that crosses the salt I've sailed all the seventeen seas Sail her home now Cross the wide sea Sail her home boys Set her sails free We barrelled into the ale-house My drinking buddies and me We ended up in the jail-house Three days before we were free There's no other option but once again To sail with the very next breeze Sail her home now To her home town Sail her home boys To her home ground This is the story of a castaway man Who discovered a pathway through the waves This is the story of a sailor bound for glory And his ship mates who prayed he'd be saved This is the story of the man who walked across the sea
6.
Rosanno Brazzi and Mitzi Gaynor Rosanno Brazzi He was an Italian Who acted in a number of roles He said “What the heck! They've paid me a cheque To play Emille de Becq In Hawaii – oh” The song he sang Was “Some Enchanted Evening” With Georgio Tozzi as his voice They tried everything To get him to sing With Hollywood strings But Tozzi was their choice Shadows and lights All over the big screen We wait in the dark To view the next scene Drama so lame shows Something is wrong Could this be the right time To burst into song? Mitzi Gaynor was the leading lady She washed that man right out of her hair What's in a name? Nothing's the same The same as a dame In Vanity Fair Within my dreams The dreams of “South Pacific” We'd float downstream With something cool Never say die Not too late to try To sing “Bali Hai” No don't be so cruel Don't be so cruel
7.
Contenders for the Darwin Awards They took a selfie on the mountain top On the edge of a ledge with a drop They were enamoured But they made an error When they stepped back There was a lawyer in a tower block Who declared that his windows were strong He took a run at the glass And he was proved wrong We should be thankful to these sorry fools To take an exit from the gene pool I'm not intending to be cruel But thank the Lord The contenders for the Darwin Awards You must fulfil one condition If you want the prize You must not have any children Before your demise You are free to trust your life On your naivete But don't mess up the gene pool With your rotten DNA He was a Russian with the psychic power To stop the Trans Siberian train Stood in the middle of the track Now he's in the Ukraine We should be grateful to this tragic horde To swap existence for the Evermore They say survival is its own reward So thank the Lord The contenders for the Darwin Awards
8.
This is NOT a Waltz Here's an example of things that are false “Waltzing Matilda” is not a waltz The waltz that comes from Tennessee As sung by Sam Cooke isn't even in three The waltz was queen of pent desires Where it came from no-one knows Now we don't know how it goes The waltz was wild as wheels of fire There's a tune that sounds like “Chopsticks” to me It's better known as the waltz of the flea “The Toxic Waltz” is a rock song you see Don't mention the waltz named for Mephistopheles The waltz tornado never missed She turned like a whirlwind in the sand She swept all before her cross the land The waltz was Eros in a bodice Round and round why go so slow Round and round we go This is NOT a waltz This is NOT a waltz
9.
The Age of Shame Age of liars Lit by the fires Of books that appal Flames of war Immigrant hordes Border the walls Here comes the north wind Here comes the storm Here comes the deluge The locust swarm Sheep of state Guardians of hate Each one is sold What they say Turns my feet to clay My blood runs cold Year of the Plague The age of rage A virus phage The age of rage Germs are rife They breed unseen Nothing is clean Sons of strife Only demean The holiest dreams The Sacrophage The age of rage Who takes the blame? The age of shame Year of the Plague The age of rage A virus phage The age of rage The Sacrophage The age of rage Who takes the blame? The age of shame

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released January 9, 2022

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Echo Park Orchestra Finestrat, Spain

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